Securing Rewards in Marriage
by Hazrat Maulana Yunus Patel Saheb (rahmatullah ‘alayh)
The Sawab (reward) for the sabr (patience) a woman exercises over her difficulties in managing the home of her husband and fulfilling the rights of her husband and children sometimes is such that it makes her ‘reach' Allah Ta'ala very quickly. This, however, is conditional to her obedience to Allah Ta'ala, fulfilling His Rights, the Rights of His Rasul (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam), and the Rights of His Creation.
Women who have children, even a temperamental husband, together with many household chores and other responsibilities, sometimes think that they cannot achieve the ranks of the Awliya-Allah[1] because they do not have time for ‘Wazifas'[2] and Nawafil [3] (optional prayers).
I tell them that they do not need to worry about too many Wazifas. The most important ‘Wazifa' is abstinence from all sins. Added to this, they should correct their niyyah or intention in all they do as routine housework. Make the intention of pleasing Allah Ta'ala, then that same housework becomes Ibadah. In this simple way, they will easily secure great rewards and the same spiritual stages, if not higher.
Similarly, the Sawab for the sabr a man exercises over his wife's shortcomings, emotional outbursts or mood swings is a medium by which he too acquires great rewards and reaches Allah Ta'ala very quickly.
Many Awliya-Allah reached great spiritual heights and were accepted for tremendous service to Deen on the patience they adopted with their wives and on the love, care, affection, tenderness and generosity they also extended to their wives.
Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) set the perfect example for husbands. Despite the tremendous responsibilities that he was entrusted with, he gave due attention and time to his wives and treated them with love and generosity. He was never harsh or insensitive towards any single wife.
Rasulullah (sallallahu ‘alayhi wa sallam) also said:
“The best amongst the Believers is he is whose character is the best. And the best among you is the one who is best towards his wife.”[4]
[1] Awliya-Allah : Friends of Allah Ta’ala
[2] Wazifas: additional, optional supplications
[3] Nawafil: Optional prayers
[4] Tirmidhi